The Urbansuburban

Go Get You Some Inspiration

Urbansuburban — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 00:57:23 GMT

Guess what? It’s really hard to write 50,000 words in 30 days. I knew it was a difficult endeavor, but I believed if I freed myself from the rules I’d have more than 3845 words by now. Of course, I have lacked "butt in the chair" time. I knew that this weekend I’d need a shot in the arm to force me to write instead of watching the six hours of Ugly Betty episodes on my digital recorder.

I have been a member of the California Writers Club for several years now. We meet the second Saturday of each month. There’s a speaker, great lunch, and an opportunity to network with other writers. I enjoy these meetings, however being a mother of school aged children does mean that sometimes I’m not available the second Tuesday of each month. Also, my budget tells me that I should not shell out $20 bucks if the speaker of the month is not pertinent to my current writing. Next month the speaker will talk about historical fiction. This is not my writing area so I’ll probably sit that one out. If time and money were never an issue, I would most certainly go to every month, because I believe there’s always something to learn.

Today’s meeting was also a workshop and I not only was counting the days, I invited my husband along too. Our workshop leader was Janis Cooke Newman, author of The Russian Word for Snow and Mary. I have been fortunate to have taken a couple of workshops with her at The Writing Salon and she is one of the best instructors I’ve ever had. Her advice is so practical and useful. She delivers nuts and bolts advice that you can immediately apply to your writing. I scribbled down six pages of extensive notes!

She mentioned this article in a recent issue of The Wall Street Journal. I thought all of us NaNo writers might pick up a bit of inspiration from reading about how some of the greats do it.

I left feeling refreshed in my writing. I wish I could tell you all about the great topics we covered, but I really should get to writing. Let me leave you with this tidbit of useful advice she gave. “You can’t re-write the beginning until you write the end.” I know a lot of us want to rewrite and or chuck some of things we wrote last week, or even last night. To this I say, “Keep going forward!” Although I don’t have a high word count, my novel has already started in a direction I never planned. I will let he process guide me.

We NaNo writers are lucky. We don’t have a book contract or anticipated audiences. We are writing for ourselves; let everything spill on to page. You are free to throw it all on the page and see what sticks.

I hope I’ve revved you up a bit. Go forth and write!

NaNo Realization

Urbansuburban — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 04:03:32 GMT

Since I’ve never dived into NaNo before, I’m guessing this is about the time of the month when you begin to realize that there’s no way in hell you’re writing 50,000 words by the end of November!

Maybe if I didn’t have a full time job? Maybe if I didn’t have two kids, a 7^th grade essay on Huck Finn to proof read, laundry, oh, and I HAVE to watch tonight’s episode of Glee!

I considered calling in sick to work, (can I say I have NaNo flu?) but this time of year, it’s only going to put me behind.

So the challenge really is how many words can I write by the end of month? I’m currently at 3636 and I’m not sure that will change too much until the weekend. I have plans on both Saturday and Sunday, but sometimes I’m even more productive on days when I’m running around crazy.

Also, I feel guilty when I write other things, like this. This is already 166 words I could be adding to my novel. Now it’s 180.

How are you guys doing?

NaNoWriMo Weekend

Urbansuburban — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 17:58:55 GMT

Okay, so I have nothing to do this weekend. The house is in decent shape. I finally have a washing machine, so no more time suckage trips to the Laundromat. My son doesn’t have a ridiculous school project that needs my attention and my husband is going into the office today to catch up on some work. I have tons of time on my hands. It has to be crazy wild NaNoWriMo weekend!

Now my main computer has another virus so it’s back in the shop. I will have to fight for computer time with the rest of the familia, but I think I can wrangle some serious key banging time. I do have my little Dell notebook, so I hope it’s not an issue to write on two different computers.

I just found out that a local bookstore is having write-ins every Sunday this month! I think I might give it a try. Maybe I can find some local writing buds, which is always cool. My husband will be knee-deep in football tomorrow so I’m confident that I can slip away for awhile.

I do have a question for you seasoned NaNo’s. Where do I find the “buddies” section? I’ve clicked all over the place and I can’t find where you can look at other people’s profiles. Also, I need names baby! My handle is “Colleenie.” Let me know what you all are signed up as.

Good luck this weekend. The home page says we should have 15,000 words by the end of the weekend. Wow, that’s a tall order. I’m trying to stay organic. I’m not writing a previous subject matter of interest, I’m not editing or re-reading. I’m trusting that the process will carry me along.

I Must Be Crazy!

Urbansuburban — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 04:06:58 GMT

I blame all of you wonderful PNNers. What else would make me sign up for NaNoWriMo? I certainly do not have time to write 50,000 words by the end of the month. I have too many things to do as it is. But then you all went and inspired me! Each year I say I’m going to do it, but I come to my senses and talk myself out of it. I mean what am I going to do when Thanksgiving rolls around? I’m not going to have time to be plugging away at the computer.

See, I figure we’ll all support each other right? You will all be there when I’m up till midnight helping my son study for a social studies test and there’s no way I’m going to get one word on the computer.

When my friends and family start to feel neglected because I’m constantly plunking away and can never talk, listen, or spend quality time with them, you will all reassure me it’s for a good cause. You’ll promise to still be my friends even when all my non-writing friends have left me for people who actually communicate with them.

So I’m in it! Are you? Will you really do this with me? I wrote 701 words tonight. At this point I really don’t believe I can write 50,000, but I’m willing to attempt to surprise myself.

I’m not even really sure what my story is, but the website assures me that it will take on a life of its own.

The website itself seems like a lot of fun, but I don’t have time to look at any of it…I have to write!

Apparently, they have a big swanky party every November. I clicked that link to see where they hold it. San Francisco! That’s just a 40 minute BART (i.e. subway) ride away for me! Boy, that’s tempting.

Okay, we all have to support each other. I have no more vacations days left at work for the rest of this year. Where is the time going to come from? I’m still taking my computer class, I work 40 hours a week, I have a house to take care of, I have two teenagers, I have a dog. I do not have time for NaNoWriMo. Like I said, I must be crazy!

A Halloween Like No Other

Urbansuburban — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 05:18:32 GMT

Yesterday was a strange Halloween at my house. My daughter went out with her friends. They are sixteen, so the trick-or-treating is borderline. They scored some candy and then went back to a girlfriend’s house to watch a movie.

My son will be thirteen next month. He was invited to go trick-or-treating with some of the girls from his 7^th grade class. As he was leaving I thought to ask, “Were you the only boy invited?” He nonchalantly answered, “Yeah.” His group was still young enough to include an adult chaperone, but still, the only boy?

As I handed out pillow cases, reminded them to thank the candy bearers, cross the street carefully, not to enter anyone’s home and trimmed my son’s ghost sheet, I realized I would be having a childless Halloween. It kind of crept up on me and it was a little weird.

Halloween is usually a fun and hectic time at my house. Last year my son wanted to be a pancake and that costume took up quite a bit of my free time. This year he just wanted a white sheet. My daughter made a group costume with her friends and didn’t even need me to drive her to the party supply store. She got her own ride!

It’s nice to see the kids fly on their own, but each year I really do feel older. Believe me, I’m not pining away for more kids. However, they are so adorable on Halloween! Every Halloween I want them to be 3-5 years old again. Well at least I’d get to hand out candy.

I’m the most embarrassing mom when it comes to handing out candy. I have to comment on all the costumes, feign fear and ooh and ah!

My first trick-or-treater of the evening fed my “neglected mommy” for the entire evening.

The doorbell rang for the first time of the night and I was greeted by an adorable toddler in a dinosaur costume. He held out his bag with an enthusiastic TRICK OR TREAT and was very pleased to see that this would yield candy. So much so that he walked right in! Then my dog, secured by the baby gate in the family room, began to bark. This overjoyed the little treater, he shouted “Doggie!” and even with Dad close behind, he still reached my dog before Dad could get there and the two were having a nice time. The little guy was happy, my dog was happy and I was tickled to death. I told my little friend that if he spent this long at everyone’s house, he’d be out very late. He decided to go on his way.

My son came home at 10:30 and my daughter at 11pm. They both had great evenings with their friends and I had a pretty great evening too. Things change, things stay the same, it’s all good and little old mom will be okay.

Affirmation

Urbansuburban — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 05:45:22 GMT

Last night I went to my webdesign class and it was simply horrible! I missed class last week and apparently that was when they decided to get off their ass and finally do stuff! The class had been going along at such a snails pace, I thought if I read the book, I’d be fine.

I had no clue what was going on. It was that feeling where you feel so lost and stupid that you might start bawling! The teacher also threw in a few times that I and the other absent person were, “really going to have to catch up!”

My classmate kept trying to help me and I was feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. She even called the teacher over to help me when I didn’t want to raise my hand. I didn’t want to take time away from the rest of class; after all, I wasn’t there, so I should have to suffer the consequences. I felt so lost I considered packing up and calling it quits. I mean really, nothing has gone right since I signed up for the classes. Maybe I should listen to the signals?

I finally caught up and was following along with everyone else. I stuck it out with a big shout out to the two wonderful ladies that sit next to me. They seem to know so much more than I do. Everyone seems to know so much more than I do. During the break I talked with my classmates about how I don’t really understand what I’m doing. Even if I had Dreamweaver (the program we’re using) at home, I’d don’t think I’d know what to do with it. We jump around to so many different screens and files, half the time, I don’t know how I got there!

My classmate said I needed to get an affirmation. She suggested that I write, “I understand every aspect of Dreamweaver,” then tape it up to my computer. I guess that’s more positive than quitting. I had to stay after class so my teacher could show me how to back-up my work. Talk about leaving class feeling completely deflated.

This morning I arrived at my day job. I made the coffee, (I make it the best) opened my e-mail, read one that pissed me off and would steer the course of my day, printed my bank report and then opened my MSN Homepage. First I log on to my online radio, KKSF smooth jazz, then, I read my horoscope. The following is my actually horoscope, I kid you not:

Today's Scorpio Horoscope:

Oct 21, 2009

A project that you're working on, perhaps job-related, perhaps personal, is likely to require more creative skills than you usually need, dear Scorpio. Writing, drawing, or computer graphics and HTML may be involved. You may have some doubts about your abilities in this regard, but you're more likely to surprise yourself with the results than otherwise. You're apt to enjoy working this way and may hope to continue doing it. Keep up the good work, and good luck!

So I guess I have my affirmation! Damm, I was really hoping to throw in the towel!

I've Been Rejected!

Urbansuburban — Sun, 18 Oct 2009 05:52:53 GMT

Well I had to take a tiny stress hiatus. Last week I had to do the bare minimum just to get through it. I’ve fallen off my writing wagon and now I’m trying to climb back on. Actually, I fell off all my wagons. I haven’t updated my Facebook status, or e-mailed my family. You know how it goes, after awhile, who’s going to want to keep listening to all your problems?

In a nutshell, this was how my week went down. The washing machine broke last Saturday. I’ve already been to the Laundromat four times! Talk about time suckage! The repair quote was a thousand dollars. The drum is broken, this seems odd on a six year old machine, but I guess they don’t make things like they use to, eh? My few attempts to get hooked up with a used or refurbished machine fell through. On Sunday I gave up and purchased a new one for $500. What joy when the sales person told me that model was on back order, (probably because it’s the cheapest one) so I’ll most likely still be logging in some serious hours at the Laundromat until I get a delivery date.

Sunday, my computer became infected with a virus that my virus protection couldn’t fix. It had to go to the computer doctor and come back clean…$150 dollars later! Now, all my settings are screwed up and it’s still a pain in the butt to get normal task accomplished.

Then the most annoying tidbit of all… Adobe rejected my student status and I had to return all of my webdesign software! If this wasn’t disheartening enough, I found out that I would be charged a “restocking” fee of $53 dollars and of course I had to pay the UPS shipping of over $20 dollars. All-in-all, I’m out $75 bucks and I still have nothing! I sent a nasty e-mail to my instructor, but I don’t expect much to happen. Technically, they are not telling you to purchase software, but we all know it would be pretty tough to do anything without it. It’s really soured me to the class, but I’ll finish this one and then reassess my feelings. I don’t want to jump to any hasty decisions.

Overall, I’ve been sort of pissy. I was up till 12:30am yesterday helping my son rewrite his English essay. Work has been overwhelming with lots of extra things cropping up. Even my treat of a nice slice of chocolate cake ended up, frosting side down, on my Flight of the Conchords T-shirt! Of course, I have no washing machine, so it just seems befitting.

I know people are going through far worse things in their life than I am. This I know and I try to keep it all in perspective, but weeks like these sure are draining. It’s difficult when I can’t do the things that help me relax. I missed being on PNN and writing my entertainment reviews. I’m trying so hard to better myself and I feel thwarted at every turn. I’m trying to push back, but sometimes, I’d rather take a nap!

I’m trying to leave it all behind me. Dealing with what I’ve been dealt and picking up the pieces is the best sign of progress I can achieve in my efforts to remake myself as a better person. We can learn new skills and make ourselves smarter, but isn’t it how we handle ourselves during tough times that really shows our measures of strength and maturity as human beings? I’m going to go with that for now and pull up my boot straps and march on!

This is Getting Ridiculous!

Urbansuburban — Sun, 04 Oct 2009 16:32:46 GMT

If you will all indulge my venting for a moment it will be appreciated. I really don’t want to come off as whiney or someone who is always so gloom and doom, but this week I’ve felt like, “Are ya freakin’ kidding me?”

I finally received the software for my web design class, but they did not verify my student authorization as I originally thought. Even though they made me send them a letter, they basically shipped whatever I wanted and I now have to be authorized by Adobe before I receive the authorization code to download the programs I need. If they turn me down, I’ll get a refund but I most certainly will be out the shipping charges both ways. If you’re wondering why this is such a problem it’s because the Adobe website clearly says that Adult Education does not qualify as an official student. However, my instructor tells me this is where everyone gets it and no one has ever had a problem. Asking around, I’m finding that people are having relatives who qualify, purchase it for them!

So I’m prepared to deal with this crap over the weekend and finally find out once and for all, if I’m even going to able to get the programs I need to take these classes. Now, I’m having computer problems! Every website I go into says it’s unsafe and invalid. I keep getting a pop-up for a place that wants me to pay them $69.95 for their protection. I can’t seem to get this off and my virus protection is scanning my computer saying everything is hunky-dory!

The e-mail to my IT buddy is still unanswered so I don’t know if he’s even around this weekend. I’m hesitant to load new programs to a computer that may be infected with something. In the end, if everything worked out in my favor; I receive my authorization code and my computer gets cleaned up, the programs still might not work properly because I don’t know if I have a strong enough graphics card and memory to handle this heavily animated software.

I feel like in an effort to better myself with knowledge, I opened a whole can of worms and created extra problems and stress for myself. I’ve been working hard to bring a calming presence into my life, what have I done? Lately, I’m feeling more stressed out and pissed off than ever! I’m constantly worried and grumpy, it all seems counter-productive to my attempts to better myself.

My ever supportive husband assures me that this is nature of being a student. I can look forward to many days of not getting anything done and wasting valuable time. Gee, that sounds great!

I’m also feeling quite anxious because if Adobe will not accept my student verification I have to hurry to return my items for a refund. I don’t know how long or how complicated it’s going to be to fix my computer, (if you’re wondering, I’m typing this on the old dinosaur computer) it could be awhile before I’m “back in business.” I wonder if I’m somehow being tested. I keep telling myself to stick it out and in the end, I will be victorious. I have to show the cosmos that they can’t mess with me! It’s on universe!

Oh, by the way, the washing machine broke yesterday.

Cosmos 2 Me O.

Now I Remember - Part Two

Urbansuburban — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 05:44:56 GMT

Well I can’t thank the PNN community enough for getting me through a tough week. I definitely had the best team PNN has to offer! With our two newly crowned “Supporters of the Month”, Mother of Many and Jen Daniele, plus close contender Verby, not to mention Jenny Rebecca and Kimberly…whew, how could I lose?

I wanted to let you all know that my teacher arrived to class with a huge stack of signed letters of “student verification.” Apparently, the regular office lady had a death in the family and was not in last week. I was still hesitant that the software site would accept the letter, but my teacher said she knew of no one in the past having a problem. Why would I be so disbelieving? Well, I heard two classmates talking about their software purchase before class, so I interrupted and asked what website they used. They both told me they had daughters in college, so they had them order it! I was a bit miffed. I didn’t want to have to “know” someone. I was legitimately taking this class; I should qualify for the discount!

I was relived to find out that she was correct. I placed my order Wednesday morning and faxed over my letter. I’m currently tracking it on the UPS website! I’m pretty jazzed that I’m getting over $2,000.00 in software for $600 bucks. It might be awhile before I know what to do with most of it, but I’m on my way. At least I know I’m set now for the intermediate and advanced class.

At first I wasn’t sure I wanted to make such a leap. It’s a lot to learn and I’m not always the sharpest pencil in the stack. Still, I keep searching for things that truly interest me and that could help me move away from the 9 to 5. I find that I have very solid ideas of how I want things to look design wise. I’ve drawn all my life and did attend art school for awhile. I realized I wasn’t that great, so maybe the graphic design is the way to go for me. I have some decent drawing skills and the computer can help me with the rest. I’m pretty excited!

I guess I should stop blogging and get to my homework. Now I need you guys to keep me from procrastinating! Thanks everyone!

Now I Remember

Urbansuburban — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 05:01:24 GMT

Over the weekend I realized why I’m not normally in school. School is a pain in the ass! I basically wasted my whole weekend attempting to do my assignments and I have nothing to show for it!

The first thing I was supposed to do was download files to my home computer that correspond with my textbook. I spent all of Saturday morning trying to figure out where the files were. Once I finally found what I thought was the correct info and the instructions to download, I felt I could redeem my lost time. All the files were downloaded, but when I went into the folders, it was information from a different textbook!

School has a tendency to make me feel stupid. I feel like the information doesn’t come as easily to me as everyone else. It quickly dredges up all the dormant fears of not doing well and basically being un-teachable.

Then there’s the frustration factor of not being able to take care of simple administrative functions. I spent my first week of class trying to decide if I should purchase web design software or wait to see how much I could learn in this class. I finally decided that if I’m going to do it, I need to really do it (thanks, all you PNNers!). Apparently, this was the easiest part of the process.

Finding a website that will accept “Continuing Adult Education” as a qualifying school, in order to receive a discount, is proving to be an impossible task. An e-mail to my teacher asking where past students have been purchasing their software is still unanswered. I also spent everyday on the phone with the school trying to get a copy of my tuition receipt. I didn’t get one when I enrolled (they usually mail it to you) and I need this as proof that I’m in the class. Once I have it, I then need to fax it to whatever company I ordered my software from (if I ever find one). No one could help me. I had to leave messages every where and finally didn’t get it resolved until Friday. I found out that a lot of the staff is new and some key people were out last week.

My teacher wanted us to have our software by the third class session, which is tomorrow night. Also, if I’m not going to be able to purchase the programs I need at a somewhat reasonable rate, I wonder if I can even afford to be a web designer! It’s all overwhelming and quite depressing.

I guess simply wanting to make a change in your life isn’t enough

Peter, Paul, Mary and Daddy & Me

Urbansuburban — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 03:52:55 GMT

Sometimes it’s hard to understand why celebrity deaths can hit us so hard. We don’t know the celebrity personally, on the contrary, we knew very little, if nothing about them as a real person.

This summer has had an unusually high number of celebrity deaths, many passing before their time.

Michael Jackson affected me deeply. He was an icon I grew up with my entire life. Even though I’m in my 40”s, I can’t recall a time when he was not famous. He was a celebrity for that long!

And although I have fond memories of spinning his records and rushing home to see the World Premiere of Thriller, Michael was my icon. Wednesday we lost an icon from my father’s generation. Mary Travers, of the 60’s folk group Peter, Paul and Mary, passed away at the age of 72.

Although many people now live past this age, it’s still too old to apply, “Gone before their time.” Mary Travers had a long, wonderful musical career. What did strike me about her passing were all the feelings it brought up about my relationship with my Dad.

One of my inherited traits from my father is a deep love of music. Of course, once I hit my teens, our paths diverged. I listened to R&B, Rock, New Wave, Punk, Disco and Pop. My dad didn’t share any of these genres with me. I, for the most part, ditched the music my dad and I would listen to together. Gone were the lazy Sundays sitting on my parents’ huge bed, while my dad put one his Country, Folk or Broadway albums. My mom was a casual music listener, so the stereo was put to better use in the bedroom instead of the living room. Dad and I could spend the whole afternoon listening to records, while Mom watched TV and made dinner.

Although my dad was never one to talk politics, he had a big interest in 60’s folk music. I never knew if he agreed with the political stances a lot of these songs were taking, or if he just liked the harmony and vocals. I enjoy Punk Rock, but I’m not an anarchist. I never bothered to ask him, I just sat and listened. I didn’t really dig Joan Baez, but I liked the Kingston Trio and I loved Peter, Paul & Mary. Mary Travers voice was so angelic. I too would sing, Leaving On A Jet Plane and pretend that what croaked from me was actually as beautiful as her luxurious notes.

My dad was ecstatic to find out from my fifth grade teacher, Mrs. Chin, that I taught the whole class all the words to Puff, the Magic Dragon. She tried to teach us, but kept forgetting the words, it was my duty to dragon lovers everywhere to step in. I remember my dad telling me that some people thought the song was about taking drugs. He was appalled that people would try to soil a beautiful tune about an innocent friendship.

On the surface, my dad was a hard shell of man. He didn’t show tenderness or emotions much. Seeing his love for tender songs like these, confirmed for me that it lurked in there somewhere, but like most men of his generation, it was a sign a weakness to show too much of it.

As I got older, I went out with friends and later boyfriends on Sundays. I no longer sat on the huge bed reading liner notes and comparing album covers. Still, the ground had already been laid for a lifetime love of music and connection it gave us.

When I married, I planned a traditional Catholic wedding in a huge church. My dad had not stepped foot in a church since he was a kid. Then the reception was in a glorious hall with family and friends. Dad always hated social gatherings. He graciously told me it was my day and he would wear and do anything that I needed. Twenty years later, I still appreciate his seemingly simple gesture to me. Anyone who’s ever planned a wedding knows how stressful uncooperative family and guests can be. I was grateful that I had one person who only wanted to make my special day a happy one. I knew we’d have our dance together and I wanted it to be a moment that he could remember. Instead of picking from wedding standards, I surprised my dad with – yes you guessed it - Puff the Magic Dragon. Our dance was one of my most cherished memories. Everyone in attendance knew this obscure song choice had to a very personal decision and my dad beamed with pride that I was not embarrassed for everyone to know this was our song.

When I was pregnant with my first child, I found out that Peter, Paul & Mary was going to play a concert in the suburban town of Concord were I had moved with my husband. My dad had never seen them live. A band from the 60’s now performing in the 90’s? This opportunity may not come around again, so I had to get tickets.

I can truly say that this was one of my dad’s happiest days. To see his daughter sitting on the lawn, his grandchild growing inside, and all the people in attendance could look over view his daughter, who knew all the words to: 500 Miles, Blowin’ In the Wind, If I Had A Hammer, Leaving On A Jet Plane and The Times They Are A Changin’. We had a blast!

My dad passed away a couple of years after the concert. He lived to see his granddaughter, but not my son. I thank God for the music he gave me and I’m grateful that I was able to give it back to him in some small way.

So if you swipe my iPod and see that I have Prince, The Police, The Shins, Al Green, Lady Gaga and Peter, Paul and Mary, you’ll understand why.

It's Too Damm Hot!

Urbansuburban — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 06:36:05 GMT

Okay, so this is the time of the year where I’m begging Fall to begin. Today, I even dug out my long pants! It’s too hot to wear them, but I can dream. I’ve lived in the suburbs for eighteen years now and I still can’t take the heat.

Whenever I hear people complain about the fog and cooler temperatures in San Francisco, I want to revoke their city living status. I love the fog rolling in. I love that you always need to bring a jacket because it “could” get chilly. The first couple of years in the burbs, I looked like a total dork walking around in 100 degree weather with a jacket over my arm!

The San Francisco Bay Area is known for their micro-climates. It can be 20 to 30 degrees hotter inland. In addition, we get a bit more of the seasons. So it’s true that it’s colder here in the winter, but I like my year round mild temperatures that only the city can supply.

I have been wearing capris and skirts for three months now! I want cozy sweaters and scarves. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not looking for snow. I love looking at a huge fog bank resting atop my beloved city.

Sometimes, I escape to the city just to enjoy the cooler weather. Unfortunately, by the time I get there, the fog as burned off. This is what entices me to move back to San Francisco. I could never afford it, but I’m looking into a “fog lover” rebate. It would only be fair.

Mom Strike

Urbansuburban — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 07:00:48 GMT

Well my day in San Francisco was ruined by two whiny teenagers and an unexpected dental procedure.

It appears that I was the only one in the family with a cavity! My dentist doesn’t usually do fillings on Saturdays, so I thought I was safe. Since my dentist is far from my home, it is a pain if I have to go in during the week. He kindly made an acceptation and offer to do the filling right then.

My family and I were planning to have lunch right after our checkups, since it was near two o’clock. I knew that eating was not going to be something on my agenda for a few hours now. I suggested to my husband that he take himself and the kids to eat and I would meet them when I was done.

“Oh no,” he began. “We’ll wait for you.”

“Look, I’m not going to feel like eating for awhile, so please take them and yourself to eat.”

“What are you going to do? You have to eat.”

“I’m not going to be able to eat, even if I want to, so can you just please go.”

“No, you’ll get sick if you wait that long. You can eat eggs or soup. Really, we’ll wait for you, it’s okay.”

You can imagine how frustrating this exchange was. I understand and appreciate my husband looking out for me, but these are the kinds of situations that drive me nuts. I’m making what I need very clear, yet I feel like no one is listening.

They waited and the filling didn’t take very long, however I was quite numb. We went to the diner and I watched as my daughter ordered the cheeseburger I’d been looking forward to all week. I scanned the menu for something I though I could gnaw on and settled on a mushroom omelet. With my first swallow, I realized half of my throat was also numb and eating was not going to happen.

Our lunch conversation consisted of my daughter complaining about all the homework she had and how this was really cutting into her time, while my son wanted a minute by minute itinerary of everything we thought we would do and exactly when we could expect to be home. I finally had to give up trying to eat and I sat back exasperated. I was the one uncomfortable, yet I was still trying to make the best of the rest of days. Next up, I wanted to go to my favorite bookstore, but it was all crumbling around me.

The weather was my perfect order. The rain had stopped and it was overcast and cool. I was wearing long pants for the first time in months! The wind was actually blowing, for me this is heaven. I would brush this off and have my day. My daughter was resigned to her fate, but my son just kept going on and on about everything. When he saw me push my plate aside after only a couple of bites he asked why I was complaining so much! I was simply flabbergasted! I’m numb, starving and frustrated. I know when my son gets this way it’s never going to let up. I don’t want him to win by ruining my day, but do I really want to listen to this crap while attempting to have a good time?

My son had a disappointing morning at basketball tryouts. He’s an excellent player, but is often overlooked due to his small size. Each year, he arrives at tryouts and sees how much everyone has grown, and even though he’s grown almost two inches this summer, he still trails behind. I sympathize with his rough day, but when you are in pain and hungry it can quickly snowball to be more than a mom can take.

I turned to my husband and said, “I want to go home.” My husband tried to convince me to stick it out, ignore the kids and try to enjoy the day we both looked forward to all week. I didn’t have it in me. He at least convinced me to go to the bookstore, since it was only a couple of blocks away. I agreed. We were not in the store for more than five minutes and my son got under my skin again. Obviously, I was over my limit. I decided to remove my self from all of it. I went on Mom Strike!

I walked out of the store and stood outside. I sent my husband a text as to my whereabouts. It seemed to take them all quite a long time. I knew my husband was buying a gift for his brother, but it was taking longer than it should. Finally, they all came out and we walked silently to the car.

As soon as we arrived home, I let the dog out and went to my bedroom and shut the door. I slept for two hours until my Novocain wore off. Once I could eat, I emerged and heated up a can of soup and took that back to my room. No one spoke to me and I was glad. I could hear their little squabbles and rustling around, but they were going to have to work it all out on their own. Luckily, I have a TV and cable in the bedroom and I discovered that, “The Devil Wears Prada” was just starting. I returned to the kitchen briefly for a box of Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Crisps and a large glass of wine.

I was actually starting to enjoy my little strike. It’s amazing what a few hours can do for a mom. Later, my daughter came in to see how I was doing. My son stayed wisely in his room. After the movie, my husband came in the room to check up on me. He apologized for not listening to my request earlier and I told him I was sorry that I couldn’t put it all aside. Then he told me he bought me something. What? When would he have done that? Well when he was taking so long in the bookstore it was because he saw a coffee mug for me. You can’t be mad at a man who buys you a Green Apple Books coffee mug.

My son is officially a teenager this December. I remember my daughter being quite a pill at his age. Now, I hang out with my daughter a lot and we have many things in common. I know this will come to a screeching halt the moment she gets a boyfriend, but I’m trying to enjoy her while she’s here. When I have days like Saturday, I wonder if I’ll make it through these teen years. I hope my son and I can find our way soon. I’m glad I only have to go through this with two kids. I’m getting too old for all of it!

A Day in San Francisco

Urbansuburban — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 15:53:00 GMT

Most people would hate going to the dentist but not me. I’ve had the same dentist for about 18 years and we always have fun conversations while he’s scrapping my plaque away. It’s my firm belief that you should not cast aside a good dentist that you can trust. So, even when my husband and I moved to the suburbs, we kept our San Francisco dentist.

People here think I’m crazy, but really, we only go twice a year, what’s the big deal? And the best part is that after our checkups, we get to hang out in San Francisco the rest of the day!

My dentist is in a fun neighborhood which happens to be the home of one of the best independent bookstores around! There’s also a great little diner that makes an awesome breakfast and some of the best burgers I’ve found anywhere!

Unfortunately, I was awakened at 5:30 am by a huge thunderstorm. Yesterday the temperature here was 98 degrees, so the storm is a bit weird. The dog freaked out and it woke my son up. I hope it doesn’t ruin my day. It did stop raining for now and let’s hope the worst is over.

I’m looking forward to taking my camera with my and my new PNN mug. I’ll be introducing you all to her later.

Well, I guess I’ll hop in the shower, grab my knitting for the car ride and charge up my new cell phone. I set up my Twitter account on my phone so maybe I’ll do some tweets throughout the day. If you want to follow me, I’m Colleenie41.

I hope everyone has a great Saturday!

Wah Wah Wah Wah

Urbansuburban — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 04:18:18 GMT

Whenever I have to learn something new, I feel like Charlie Brown and everything the teacher says sounds like, “Wah, Wah, Wah, Wah.”

My first night of web design class felt very overwhelming. HTML, XHTML, CSS, Browsers, Servers, oh my!

In a sense, I signed up to learn a foreign language. I flunked Spanish in High School, so foreign language is probably not my best area.

I would love to be good at this. If I could design websites and be able to maintain them, that would rock! I’m just not sure I can do it. Do you ever feel like everyone else around you seems to be more clued in than you are? I felt that way last night. The class was at full capacity, twenty students, and they all seemed to know more than I do, even though I work on a computer all day long!

The class seems very organized and by the end of this course, you will have a fully designed website up on the web. How great would that be?

I have some big decisions to make over the next couple of weeks. Our teacher says (and I agree) that the best way to learn is to do the exercises in class, but at the same time, make a website at home. If you really create a website, it’s easier to see the challenges you may face. Of course to do this, I would need some web design software. Guess what? When you are in a class, you can purchase your software at a student rate. It would be drastically cheaper than I could ever get it on my own. Like most Americans these days, money has been hard to come by. My ever supportive husband told me to just do it. I would feel horrible if I was unable to understand all this computer jargon and then I wasted money we don’t have. These are the type of fears that have held me back in the past. I don’t want to be that person anymore, but I really might not be able to decipher all this stuff. On the other hand, guilt and fear can be a huge motivator and putting out all that dough might be the driving force to make me learn!

I have so many things in the hopper right now. It’s exciting but terrifying. Things have stayed the same in my life for awhile, but now, things are not only changing, I’m the one changing them. I can only see a little farther up the path right now. I’m okay with not being able to see the end. I’m trying to just enjoy the walk.